tripping the thread
Tripping the Thread is a series of self-portraits made over the course of my portfolio quarter. They are all produced from my first project, “Hound of Heaven”, which was originally going to be my magnum opus, the greatest thing I have made so far at 24 years old. I put this project together with the intention of impressing my peers with my stories but more importantly myself. This was my first attempt at applying something I truly wanted to do in my work and I desperately wanted it to be exactly what I had in my mind.
“Hound of Heaven” was based on a story I created about two characters representing two sides: Self Sacrifice and Self destruction. It was a representation of myself and how they are different sides of the same coin followed by an inevitable death of the two. It was a way for me to share something open and honest.
It failed. That idea was shot and reshot a thousand times over, and I just couldn’t get it right. I put myself in my head thinking this was what I needed to do and if it wasn’t exact, then to do it again. My greatest idea was suddenly shoved into a tiny box with the smallest time frame.
I built up a lot of shame and discouragement and started to crack. It became something I couldn’t enjoy, and for me, this was unacceptable. Then I realized I completely disregarded the best part of my process, which is to play. A project that big and important needs time and memory attached to it, I have no retrospective to think on and nothing to improve on, it needs to exist first before I can make it better.
